The Dry River Laman

In chapter 2 of First Nephi, Lehi's family camps by the Red Sea. This was most probably a very meaningful detail to Lehi.  I can only imagine that Lehi, being a Jew, was overcome with thoughts about the children of Israel, and their history: the captivity in Egypt, the promise of a new land of freedom, the threat of certain destruction, and the hope of salvation through the Red Sea. Lehi's situation at the time was almost a perfect mirror to that of the children of Israel.

All of this must have been on Lehi's mind while exhorting Laman, “O that thou mightest be like unto this river, continually running into the fountain of all righteousness!” (1 Nephi 2:9)

Though the river mentioned emptied into the Red Sea, Lehi knew Jesus Christ to be the true Fountain of all Righteousness, the way “whereby man can be saved in the kingdom of God.” (2 Nephi 31:21)  Indeed, the children of Israel’s walk through the Red Sea, the divinely appointed means for them to escape destruction at the hands of the Egyptians, should have been (and should still be) an unforgettable reminder that there is no “other way nor means whereby salvation can come unto the children of men, only in and through the name of Christ, the Lord Omnipotent.” (Mosiah 3:17)

Interested in the actual geography of these events, I did a quick internet search and learned that no rivers feed into the Red Sea.  I’ve done no follow-up research to confirm what I found, because it’s the symbolism of what I learned that I think makes it worth mentioning.

Lehi saw a river that flowed constantly into the Red Sea, and Lehi compared that river to Laman running constantly to the Savior.  For better or for worse, we do not get to see Lehi’s hope brought to pass.  Just as there are no rivers flowing into the Red Sea, Laman and many of Laman’s descendants did not turn to Jesus Christ.

Everything we read in the scriptures has a degree of literal or physical truth and a degree of figurative or spiritual truth.  It’s not always clear to me what I’m seeing whenever I read the scriptures. Regardless, I do know the scriptures are true, and that all the promises and warnings either have or will come to pass.  Consequences for sin will be real and severe.  The redemption of the faithful will be infinite and eternal.

We might travel around the Red Sea, wondering if we would ever find a river that made its way there.  We might struggle even to find a path that a river might take to get to the Red Sea.  In the midst of such struggles, it becomes easy to give up.

We must always remember that He who made the heaven and the earth also gathered the waters and let the dry land appear. (Genesis 1:9)  It is He who gives and he who takes away. (Job 1:21)  Without Him we truly have nothing, and with Him, we are never truly in want.  He will make our cups to always overflow, if we will flow continually to Him.

Becoming a True Disciple of Jesus Christ

 

Just do your best.  I think about this phrase often, and I really don’t like it.  Hypocrite that I am, I often use the phrase myself, but I roll my eyes when I hear other people say it.  I don’t like the phrase because I find it somewhat meaningless.  But sometimes, it’s just too hard to say what you really mean.

For example, if Bro. Knapp were to ask me to give a talk on Becoming a True Disciple of Jesus Christ, I might say that I wouldn’t think I would do a very good job because I don’t really know much about becoming a true disciple of Jesus Christ.  I image that Bro. Knapp would say “Don’t worry, just do your best.”

I imagine that Bro. Knapp would not intend to have me take a week off work, withdraw all my money from my bank accounts, and hire the best speech writer I can afford to help me write my talk.  I could have done that, and if I had done that, my talk probably would be better than the one I’m giving.  If doing that would have been better, am I really doing my best?

I understand that in most situations, when someone says, “do your best,” there’s always an implied qualifier that you should be reasonable.  We mean, do your best without being excessive or unreasonable.  Do the best you can without putting to much thought or effort into it.

We have all learned to make sense of the phrase “just do your best,” but in doing so, we stripped the phrase of its meaning.  Most of the time, I don’t think that’s a problem.  But, for me, it can make things very confusing when we talk about discipleship.

I often hear it said that the Lord doesn’t expect us to be perfect.  He only expects us to do our best.  Whenever I hear anyone say that phrase, I automatically re-phrase that in mind.  The Lord doesn’t expect us to be perfect.  He only expects us to “serve him with all our heart, might, mind, and strength.” (Doctrine and Covenants 4:2 also Luke 10:27 and Deuteronomy 6:5)

I also think of Pres. Hinckley who taught “Do the best you can. But I want to emphasize that it be the very best. We are too prone to be satisfied with mediocre performance. We are capable of doing so much better.” (Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting January 2004, Standing Strong and Immovable)

When considering “doing your best” with this perspective, it seems so wrong to preface it with the word “just” as if our best were something easy to do.  How do you even know what your best is?  Even if you work tirelessly for a long time, could you have done better?  Is there something that you knew you were supposed to do, but you did not do it?  Even if there wasn’t any duty you knew you neglected, were you paying enough attention to the Spirit that you would have know if you were being prompted to do something more?

I do think these questions are important for anyone desiring to be a true disciple of Jesus Christ to ask, but it is crucial to ask these questions with the right frame of mind.

The truth is that if you spend any time at all pondering these questions with sincerity, I’m sure you will have to admit that not only have you not been perfect, but you also haven’t even been doing your best.  At least that’s what happens to me.  When I think about the choices I make, I can think of moments when there was something I knew I should have been doing, but out of laziness or pride, I decide to simply do less than my best, and I ignore the thing I should do.

When you know you have not done your best, you are in a vulnerable position.  You can see that you are weak, and you may doubt your ability to succeed.  It doesn’t matter whether your shortcomings are large or small, whether you’ve accomplished great things despite your decision to do less than your best or accomplished nothing good at all.  You are in danger of entering into one of two harmful mindsets. 

The first of these dangerous mindsets, is that it doesn’t really matter.  You might be telling yourself that you’re not perfect, but at least you’re better than some people.  Or maybe you’re saying that you’re not perfect and the Lord doesn’t expect you to be perfect, and that’s that.

This dangerous mindset reminds me of the Lamanites who lived under the reign of King Lamoni and “supposed that whatsoever they did was right.” (Alma 18:5)  I believe that it was nothing short of a miracle that after listening to the teachings of Ammon, the king was able to view his true state and report that he “I [had] seen [his] Redeemer; and he shall come forth, and be born of a woman, and he shall redeem all mankind who believe on his name.”  When this happened, we learn that “his heart was swollen within him,” (Alma 19:13) and I believe that from that point forward, King Lamoni and many of his people became true disci­­­­ples of Jesus Christ.

Of course, the story doesn’t even end there.  When King Lamoni’s father saw his son with Ammon, who was supposed to be an enemy of the Lamanites, and when he saw the love that Ammon had for his son, he was greatly bothered.  Eventually with the help of Arron, one of Ammon’s brethren, King Lamoni’s father also realized that whatsoever they did was not necessarily right.  He felt the desire to “give away all [his] sins to know [God]” (Alma 22:18)

We must ­be as King Lamoni, his father, and their righteous subjects who learned that the Lord truly does hope for us to give up “all our sins.”

But that brings us back to the second dangerous mindset we might enter.  We might recognize that because we are not perfect, we have not yet given up all our sins.  We may go even further and say that not only have we not given up all our sins, but we also haven’t even given up very many at all.  Perhaps we consider any progress we have made to be very meager at best.

This reminds me of another saying that I really dislike.  I often hear that we don’t need to be perfect, we just need to be better today than we were yesterday.  Well, sometimes I feel I have done better than the day before, but sometimes that’s a depressingly low standard.  Sometimes, even when being better than yesterday is a low standard, and still cannot even beat that.

When I look at the long term, it’s truly hard to say if I’m improving.  Am I honestly a better disciple of Jesus Christ than I was 5 years ago?  10 Years ago?  20 years ago?  In some ways I think I kind of am, but in other ways I think I’ve probably fallen a bit.

If you spend too much time thinking about how you fall short of even the lowest standard of discipleship, you may feel that your fate is already sealed.  You are who you are and that’s that.

I suspect that we will all have to face feelings of inadequacy from time to time.  But we must have the faith to move forward and do what we can.

When standards of discipleship seem too high, when the work of the Lord seems too difficult, I believe that the Lord will “prepare a way [to] accomplish the thing which he [has commanded].” (1 Nephi 3:7)  Moreover, I believe that the Lord will make the way known to you.

The specifics are different for each of us.  Maybe you, like Nephi, have tried several times already to keep the Lord’s commandments and you have failed each time.  You’ve tried and you’ve failed, you’re tired and your completely out of ideas.  But, you know where you’re supposed to go.  So, you can “[go forth] not knowing beforehand the things which [you] should do.” (1 Nephi 4:6-7)

Maybe, you know exactly what you should do, but you’re struggling to find the faith to do it.  My wife and I often joke about how we tend to repeat the wrong phrases from the scriptures, but sometimes it’s just easier to relate with Laman and Lemuel because it truly is “a hard thing” (1 Nephi 3:5) we have been asked to do.  And, if you don’t think that it’s hard to be a true disciple of Jesus Christ, then you are either doing something wrong, or you have an unpleasant surprise in store for you.  I’ve forgotten where the verse is, but I’m pretty sure somewhere in scripture is says “life is pain, and anyone who tells you differently is selling something.”

True discipleship does seem too difficult to endure sometimes, but that’s not a flaw in the plan.  That is the plan.  That’s the whole point.  Christ was the one who was able to endure when he felt that even God had forsaken him. (Matthew 27:46)  He was the one who was able to “[bear] all things [and endure] all things.” (1 Cornithians 13:7)  The point of discipleship is that we may become like Christ and be able to endure as he endured.

When we read that “he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved,” (Matt. 24:13) perhaps we would do well to think of enduring to the end as being synonymous with becoming a true disciple of Jesus Christ.  He is Endurance.  He is the End.  But, he is also the Beginning. (Revelation 22:13)

So, if on your path of discipleship, you do not see what you need to do, or if you know what you need to do but you do not see within yourself the faith to do it, remember Christ, and just keep looking.  Remember, though the gospel is about being like Christ, it is even more so about becoming like Christ.  He is the Beginning, He is the Way, and He is the End.

He has promised you that not matter your struggles, no matter your circumstance, no matter how many times you have tried and failed before, “His grace is sufficient [and if you humble yourself before him, he] will make weak things become strong” or in other words, he will make weak things become true disciples of Jesus Christ.

You're Not Good . . . Yet

 

I've been doing some thinking about the second day of creation (as presented in Genesis 1:6-8) and some research to try to understand what happens then (I don’t really get what separating waters from waters means).  In my research it was pointed out that the second day is the only day that isn’t “good”.  Well, that’s not exactly true. It’s not really the days, but the creations that are called good, but either way, God does not call anything good on the second day.

Why? 

Some people say that God did not call the parting of the water from the water good because it was division and God hates division. It seemed obvious to me pretty quickly that He didn’t hate what He had done on the second day (or else why would He have done it) and He especially doesn’t have anything against division in general (Matthew 10:34-35 comes to mind, I'm sure you can think of others), so there must have been more to it than what I was able to find in my research. 

As I thought about the question, I realized that there’s only thing with which God worked on two separate days.  He worked with the light on the first day, the grass on the third, the sun, moon and stars on the fourth, the birds and water animals on the fifth and the land animals and people on the sixth.  But, he worked with the water on both the second day and on the third.  That’s two days of working with the water.  So, at the end of the second day, he wasn’t done.  He still had more to do with the water on the third day.

It seems that God will not call something good until He's done working with it.  Even Jesus Himself seemed uncomfortable having this label applied to Him before He had finished His work on the Earth (Matthew 19:17). Judgment never comes before the end.

If you have ever felt like God never calls you good, it's probably because your not. . . yet.  As long as remain in this life, as long as we're still awaiting the great and judgement day, we're not good.  We're still in the middle the the division with ourselves.  Even though division may be necessary, that doesn't make it fun, and it might not feel good.  It might not feel good until after the gathering on the third day (Genesis 1:9-10).

I'm sure there's a lot more for me to learn about the creation (I definitely have more questions), but I'm grateful to have discovered that God has inserted a little reminder for me that there is a time for scattering and time for gathering.  I am grate that God has gathered and continues to direct the work of gathering and to know that he will until everything is "very good." (Genesis 1:31)

Jesus Loves Me

I had an experience a couple of weeks ago that felt I should share.  I was in primary (which is another story in itself) a couple of weeks while the primary children were allowed to pick their favorite songs to sing.  One song the children seemed particularly excited about was Gethsemane.

Most of what they sang was inaudible, but every time they began to sing the first part of the chorus, they sang with gusto.  One of the primary leaders brought attention to what was going on by saying "that's all they know."

It's true.  They didn't know much of the song.  But, what they did know, they sang with all of their heart: "Gethsemane!  Jesus loves me!"  I was suddenly struck by the obvious lesson the primary children were teaching me.

A favorite verse of mine reads "I know that [the Lord] loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things."  Sometimes, we can be so troubled by things that we don't know and don't understand that we forget about the things that we do know.  We don't know everything, but that doesn't have to keep us from knowing and remembering  some very important things.

So many adults would probably prefer not to sing a song at all if they didn't know the whole thing, or ate least one verse and the chorus.  So many of us often feel that it's pointless to start out doing something if we don't know all the details.  Sure, it is preferable to know the whole things start to finish, but should we let ourselves be paralyzed merely because we don't know everything?

I personally have a lot of questions and a lot of things I don't know.  I don't what that to keep me from remembering and using what I do know.  I know that Jesus loves me, so I want to sing that out loud and strong just like those primary children.

The Blissful Road

While driving home from Utah yesterday, I had a great learning experience.  We missed an exit, and I had no idea.  After 20 minutes, Caitlin wondered why were spending so much time on the interstate.  I passed the next exit and Caitlin saw a sign that indicated that the exit (the one we just passed) would have lead us to Moab (which was where we were supposed to be heading).  We took the next exit, and turned around, about forty minutes behind schedule.

The whole time we were heading the wrong way, I was blissfully happy.  As soon as I knew that I was going the wrong way, I was grumpy.  This is important in two ways.   First, the right way isn’t always the most enjoyable way.  Second, the right way will be more enjoyable if we have the right perspective.

If you find out that miss a turn, you can grumble about the time you lost, or you can rejoice that you’re no longer losing time.  Sure, it would have been better to be on the right road the entire time, but it didn’t happen.  If you’re on the right road, be glad that you are, and don’t wish that you were still blissfully going the wrong way.

Lord, Is It I

Mosiah 2:27

I recently felt prompted to write a song based on President Uchtdorf’s October 2014 General Conference address which in turn was based on verses 21 and 22 in Matthew 26.  After reading through the lyrics, my brother asked me what thoughts and feelings led to writing the worlds.  I’m glad he did.  It’s given me a chance to look a little deeper into my own thoughts and to figure out what it is I hope the song will accomplish.

To me, one of the most complicated questions about life is the question of freewill.  Do we any of us have some sort of a say in what happens in our own universe?  Are all our actions predetermined by the environments in which we're found?  If you really want to get crazy, you can wonder whether quantum mechanics has anything to do with everyday life, making our lives a mixture of all the choices we could possibly make all strung together.

A lot of us just assume that we have freewill because we don't see everything that influences our choices.  There are perhaps many determinists who view life as a complex conglomeration of several chemical reactions that must inevitably (or at least probably) happen in the right environment, leaving no room for freewill to dictate any aspect of life.  Some choose to believe that they have no freewill because without freewill they cannot be guilty of anything.  Others choose to believe that that they do have freewill because only with freewill can people make the world a better place.   Regardless, I think it's a complicated question worth considering (at least from time to time).

According to the doctrine of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the question of freewill was discussed before, but in a slightly different way.  Satan once tried to take away the agency of man and a third of the hosts of heaven followed him and were lost (Moses 4:1-4).  This conflict was so great and so terrible that members of the Church of Jesus Christ usually refer to it as the war in heaven.  Freewill is such an important concept because without it, we could never be truly happy.

In the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, the prophet Nephi described two types of people.  There are those who want to act and those who want to be acted upon (2 Nephi 2:26).  I understand that to mean that some people want to feel like their choices will have some sort of a noticeable impact and others are content to view themselves as mere observers in a grand cosmic drama.

For members of the church, freewill is not even a question.  Everyone has moral agency, the power to choose.  The question is what we will do with it.  Although in practice it gets pretty complicated, in theory Mormon doctrine can boil down to one simple idea: you will be happy if you choose happiness and you will be miserable if you choose misery.

So, how do we go about choosing happiness?  Well, that is what the Gospel of Jesus Christ teaches us.  There are many beautiful intricacies and corollaries included in the Gospel of Jesus Christ, enough so that brilliant minds have dedicated their lives to studying them and could not find the end.  As complex as the Gospel of Jesus Christ is, it can be summed up in just a few simple lines: to be purely happy you must love God and your neighbor (Matthew 22:36-39; Mark 12:28-31; D&C 14:7).  By accepting the teaching of King Benjamin, that you serve God by serving your fellowmen (Mosiah 2:27), you really just need to worry about the second part, loving your neighbor.

I don't believe this theme is unique to Christians.  I can't say I know a lot about the world, but so many philosophies seem to encourage concepts that (at least to me) are similar to love: teamwork, unity, etc.  These aren't just considered valuable in religious contexts, but in business as well.  Even in competition, when there's more focus on enjoying the game than winning the game, opposing teams work together to challenge each other in order to demonstrate a more complete range of skills (I think this is depicted well in the movie Akeelah and the Bee).

1 Corinthinas 12 describes the church of Christ being a single body made up of many members.  This illustration points out that we are all a part of each other.  We are together.  This is most certainly true regardless of what you chose to believe.  We are all part of the same universe.  What affects any one of us could affect all us, and we need to understand that if we are ever going to be truly happy.

I could go on and on, but I'm afraid I may have lost a few readers already (sometimes I wish I were an angel that I could explain the wish of my heart more clearly and concisely).  To reiterate what I have been trying to say, it's really easy to do what is right: just love your neighbor.  You have a choice and if you choose love you will be happy.  What's more, we also have an unlimited supply of do-overs at hand just in case we ever make the wrong choice.  To put that in perspective, it's as if the Lord gave us a single item, true-false test with the answer key, and an infinite number of retakes to let us get the answer right.  And yet we often fear we're going to fail.

I know it sounds close minded, but I really, honestly, with all my heart, no joking, believe that I know exactly what I need to do to be happy for now and for all time and eternity, and it's not that hard to do.  I need to try to work with those around me to make the world a better place and keep trying.  I need to let bygones be bygones and keep moving forward to do my best. Oftentimes, I do follow this prescription, and every time I do, it works.  I should have a perfect life.

I should have a perfect life, but I don't.  Why not?  What's gone wrong?  Even though some people would argue otherwise, I don't believe that happiness is at all diminished by external forces.  I'll admit that the trials I have endured are pretty pathetic when compared with many others. I can't say I would keep my chin up if I were to lose any of my dearest loved ones.  I don't know how I would be affected if I had been betrayed by most trusted confidant.  I would like to say that with sorrow in my heart I would look heavenward, pray for strength, and so carry on with my normal life, striving to do what is right.  But, I don't know.

I have faith that if I will choose to love my neighbor, I will be purely happy.  I have never had my faith shaken by any trial I've gone through (tested, yes, and tried, you bet, but not shaken).  The formula always seems to work in any circumstance (at least for me it always, always, has), but something else does seem to keep me from happiness: my choice.

It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?  I want to be happy.  I believe that I know what I need to do in order to be happy.  I know I can do what I think I need to do to be happy.  And, yet I choose something else.  I'm sitting there, staring at the test.  I have the answer sheet in my hand.  The answer sheet says that the answer is true. I want to pass the test.  The examiner gave me the answer sheet and asked me to use it to pass the test so there is absolutely no ethical or moral reason that I should try to pretend that I don't have the answer key.  I try to figure out the problem for myself.  Using my own reasoning, I believe that the answer is true.  The consequence for answering correctly is perfect reward.  The consequence for answering incorrectly is pure punishment.  There is absolutely nothing to keep me from answering the question correctly.  I just need to mark true.  I mark false.

Have you ever felt as if you had done something similar to that?  Well, I have.  There have been times were I have made choices I thought were wrong, and no matter how much I think about it, I cannot come up with any reason for the choice I make.  I just plain answer wrong.

Fortunately, I have the grace of Christ.  I honestly and firmly believe that if I just rely on His Atonement, He will save me from my all of my bad choices from the most silly to the most severe.  Sometimes I wonder if I rely too much on his grace, but I have the promise that as long as I am willing to ask forgiveness I can be forgiven (Doctrine and Covenants 64:7).

So, I find myself with this inner conflict. On one hand, I believe that I have been given the key to happiness, along with the ability and right to use it.  On the other hand, I catch myself choosing not to use it for no good reason at all.  I think I can understand Peter, at least a little bit, when he says to the Lord (and I believe in all sincerity), "though all men shall be offended because of thee, yet will I never be offended" (Matthew 26:33).  Sometimes, though perhaps misguidedly, I may even draw my sword to protect those I love (Matthew 26:51).  Shamefully, I must admit that I too at times have by my actions declared "I know not the Man" (Matthew 26:74).  Thinking about these times, I certainly wonder, when the Lord says someone betrayed Him, "Lord, is it I?" (Mathew 26:21-22).

I do wonder a little.  I wonder, from time to time, whether I actually am as free as I believe I am. I also wonder if the path I'm on is even the right one.  But, each time I wonder, always come back to the same conclusion.  The answer really is that simple.  I can choose to be happy.  And even though I fail sometimes to do what I know is right, if I just endure with faith unto the end, the Lord will give me a chance to testify, "yea, Lord, thou knowest that I love thee" (John 21:15-19).

The Testimony of Joseph Smith

Elder Neil L. Anderson challenged us to record the testimony of Joseph Smith in our own voice. Here it is.  I hope you enjoy it.

The Testimony of Joseph Smith
My Tesimony